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Should be clean and have proof of photos so I know your real. You should be able to host. I'd like to find you gift wrapped under my tree for Xmas. Huge sports fan.

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If you are, you know what I'm talking about. Ever since I've turned 20, all of my billion brothers and sisters have a new goal in their life: I've been privileged enough to have parents who have given me the freedom to make my own choices, but that doesn't stop others from worrying over my single status.

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I've been born, raised and spoiled in India, so I know I cannot escape the three ultimate litmus tests for being a true Indian: Bollywood, cricket and marriages.

All conversations I ever hear, somehow end up revolving around these three topics.

Now, people know that I'm not a Bollywood actress, nor a cricketer, or a fan of either, so that leaves them with one thing indiwn discuss: The first ever discussion on it was when I was 17, and over the years, I've learnt to just smile and wave like the Penguins of Madagascar. I'm always tempted to respond, but experience says, it is rather wise to keep all my responses inside my head.

I know, but I'm not fishing.

Who wants the cream, aunty? The real flavour is in the left-over coffee.

But I'm not lighting fires. If your friend jumps off a bridge then would you too? Want to get married again?

I thought you were already married! A billionaire who owns a private island somewhere in Europe.

Would you sponsor my tickets? I'm eyeing Slovenia, remember? If I show you a prison album, would it inspire you?

I'm just waiting for a new body to attach myself to. Being a ghost and spending all day haunting people is exhausting! You cor uncle, boys behave best when they are toddlers.

So they shouldn't grow up. I may be pretty to look at, but I'm not pretty to live with.

You should know, your wife is so pretty! What will people say? That you married a German!!!

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So if I actually go to Germany, and fall in love with a German and end up marrying him, imagine what would people say to him?

That he married an Indian!!!

I'm not sure I'm going to grow old in the first place. I think a Christmas tree look would be perfect.

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All lights and glitter infian people would come and put presents at my feet. In all seriousness, when are you getting divorced? Unfortunately they only exist in books.

All, one by one. I've had only one discussion with my mom.

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I will add further to this if I encounter newer people and their perceptions. Sign in Get started. Rutu Blocked Unblock Follow Following.

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